Sometimes all it takes is one word to destroy our self-confidence. After something like this, it’s hard to pull yourself together and move forward. How to regain your former faith in yourself in just a couple of minutes?
1. Take a victory pose and stay there for 2 minutes
In her famous TED talk, which has received more than 30 million views, Harvard University social psychologist Amy Cuddy talks about body language and the transmission of confidence. The psychologist advises: before any difficult task, practice the “power pose” - in the morning immediately after waking up, in the elevator or in front of the mirror in the toilet - anywhere.
Superhero Pose: Stand tall with your shoulders back, chin pointing slightly up, hands at your waist, and feet hip-width apart. Feel yourself filled with strength and maintain this position for 2 minutes. Try to breathe deeply and rhythmically. You can also do the starfish pose by raising your arms up in a V. Imagine yourself as an Olympic champion on the podium.
Experiments prove that people who use this technique perform better than others. After all, body language not only affects how other people see us, but it can also change the way we view ourselves.
2. Imagine yourself many years later
Having a vivid and detailed picture of what your life will be like in the future helps you overcome your fear of failure. New York University marketing technology professor Hal Hershfield asked participants in his study to imagine what would happen to them in 10 years.
After that, he showed some of the respondents their “aged” images, and then invited everyone, without exception, to become investors in startup projects. Those who saw their portrait in mature age, were likely to invest twice as often as those who did not. It turned out that by drawing pictures of the future and clearly imagining them, we rather strive to bring it closer and act more actively and decisively.
3. Give thanks for life
This is another way to see new horizons ahead of you, despite recent stress. After being fired, divorced and in debt, aspiring business coach and single mother Jen Scalia had a hard time getting back on her feet. To do this, she decided to invest in herself and go through a series of distance courses on personal development, and also performed several practices daily. All together helped her increase the profitability of her training business project from zero to half a million dollars.
“My first daily practice was gratitude. Every night I remembered the most wonderful things that happened to me and that I saw in my life. The next stage of auto-training was gratitude for the things that I had yet to receive. For example, instead of saying, “I want to get two more new clients this month,” I would say to myself, “I’m so grateful that I now have two more great clients,” says the business coach.
How does this work? It's simple: our consciousness is easily misled. These statements really help you believe in success and ultimately attract it. Plus, when we feel gratitude, we think positively and feel more energized.
Without self-confidence, it is difficult to succeed, because business consists entirely of situations in which you have to leave your comfort zone. And all of them, from meetings and negotiations to sales and managing people, go better for you the more confident you are.
Here are 7 tricks to boost your self-confidence.
1. Never forget your strengths and don't be too hard on yourself.
For your personal use only, make a list of your strengths and the things you do really well. Be honest with yourself and avoid false modesty. It is not necessary to look for and write down outstanding qualities in yourself; these are enough: I keep my desk tidy, I finish what I start, I have a good memory, and so on. Re-read this list every week and add new items if possible. There are no ideal people. We all make mistakes. And they do not always happen solely through our fault.
2. Watch your health.
If you are in good shape, you can achieve a lot. Regular physical exercise that you enjoy doing builds strength, perseverance, and increases resistance to stress. Eat a healthy diet and get enough sleep. Rest breaks, time for relaxation and time for yourself should be as integral a part of your daily routine as brushing your teeth. Enjoy the fact that you look good and try to get the most out of life. People around you will treat you with interest and respect.
3. Stay calm and try to alleviate stress.
Avoid fuss and haste. Develop stress resistance. Simple relaxation and stress management techniques will calm your body and mind and become your lifeline. Find time for relaxation every day - at least five minutes. Practice mindfulness for at least a minute every day. Those few minutes will make a big difference.
4. Remember that you, like any person, have rights.,
which must be observed at work. Here are some of them: you have the right to your own opinion, to be treated with respect and as an equal, not to be insulted, to be listened to. You have the right to make mistakes, to fail and to try again.
5. Plan, prioritize and be organized
You need to know where you are now, where you want to go and how you plan to get there. Know exactly what you want. Weigh everything carefully and plan. Decide what your first step will be and take it. Be prepared to adjust your plan as needed. Whatever task you face, prepare for it. If possible, rehearse your actions, such as giving a presentation, in advance. Pay attention to this and you will not only prepare for the upcoming event, but also increase your confidence and self-esteem.
6. Body language.
Move and speak with confidence and you will not only look like it, but you will actually feel like it. Raise your head, relax your shoulders and body, establish visual contact with the interlocutor. Show calm and confidence when you open the door and enter the room. Open pose, a firm handshake, a calm voice will show the interlocutor that you are glad to see him and communicate with him. Your speech should be clear, rhythmic, and infect with enthusiasm. Show your genuine interest and you can prove yourself to be a charismatic speaker!
7. Visualize.
Imagine chewing a slice of lemon... Your mouth is probably filled with saliva. So? The thing is that the human brain is not very good at distinguishing between what happens in the imagination and in the real world. That is why one of the simplest and effective ways strengthening willpower is visualization.
All you need to do is imagine a situation in which you want to feel more confident. Try to get a detailed image, then for a few minutes, step by step, work through the situation presented in your mind, coping with any difficulties that you think may arise. The task probably sounds strange, but it is easy to complete and the technique works.
You will succeed!
Even more about how to develop self-confidence and raise self-esteem in the book
There are events in life that require maximum calm and self-confidence: interviews, public speaking, important conversations, and the like. Fortunately, there are ways to quickly get yourself under control.
1. Take a victory pose and stay there for 2 minutes
In her famous TED talk, which has received more than 30 million views, Harvard University social psychologist Amy Cuddy talks about body language and the transmission of confidence. The psychologist advises: before any difficult task, practice the “power pose” - in the morning immediately after waking up, in the elevator or in front of the mirror in the toilet - anywhere.
Superhero Pose: Stand tall with your shoulders back, chin pointing slightly up, hands at your waist, and feet hip-width apart. Feel yourself filled with strength and maintain this position for 2 minutes. Try to breathe deeply and rhythmically. You can also do a starfish pose by raising your arms up in a V shape. Imagine yourself as an Olympic champion on the podium.
Experiments prove that people who use this technique perform better than others. After all, body language not only affects how other people see us, but it can also change the way we view ourselves.
Read:
2. Imagine yourself many years later
Having a vivid and detailed picture of what your life will be like in the future helps you overcome your fear of failure. New York University marketing technology professor Hal Hershfield asked participants in his study to imagine what would happen to them in 10 years.
After that, he showed some of the respondents their “aged” images, and then invited everyone, without exception, to become investors in startup projects. Those who saw their portrait as adults were twice as likely to invest as those who did not. It turned out that by drawing pictures of the future and clearly imagining it, we rather strive to bring it closer and act more actively and decisively.
Read:
3. Give thanks for life
This is another way to see new horizons ahead of you, despite recent stress. After being fired, divorced and in debt, aspiring business coach and single mother Jen Scalia had a hard time getting back on her feet. To do this, she decided to invest in herself and take a number of distance courses on personal development, and also performed several practices daily. All together helped her increase the profitability of her training business project from zero to half a million dollars.
“My first daily practice was gratitude. Every night I remembered the most wonderful things that happened to me and that I saw in my life. The next stage of auto-training was gratitude for the things that I had yet to receive. For example, instead of saying, “I want to get two more new clients this month,” I would say to myself, “I’m so grateful that I now have two more great clients.”- says the business coach.
How does this work? It's simple: our consciousness is easily misled. These affirmations really help you believe in success and ultimately attract it. Plus, when we feel gratitude, we think positively and feel more energized.
Read:
If your partner lacks self-confidence, it can certainly take a toll on your relationship. Of course, his self-esteem is his problem, but if you care about him, you can definitely help.
It's best to do this indirectly. Start with simple encouragement and help in overcoming the problem. If that doesn't work, there are a few other things you can do to give him confidence.
Help him focus on positive qualities
A healthy way to build relationships is based on focusing on the positive. If he dismisses all his achievements, you can give them more meaning and help him reach his goal. new level. If he wants to talk about how useless he is, take the lead in the conversation and remind him of what he does well.
Support his goals
The best way to boost his self-confidence is to support him as he sets goals. This doesn't mean you should force your partner when he doesn't want to do something, but try to be supportive and offer help when he's trying to achieve an important educational or career goal.
Give sincere compliments
If he doesn't notice his own achievements, you can help. Don't shower your partner with insincere compliments. Instead, focus on what really impresses you. If he's insecure about his appearance, complimenting him on what you like about him can help.
Don't overuse constructive criticism
People with inflated egos can easily brush off criticism even when it's valuable, but those with low self-esteem risk being completely demoralized. You won't be able to help if you completely ignore all his mistakes, but when criticizing, try to soften it with a compliment.
Thank him
A man's ego is closely tied to being able to provide and protect, so you need to show how much you appreciate what he does for you. It doesn't matter if it doesn't end well, if he had good intentions, you should point that out, while also hinting that complicated things like wiring are best left to the professionals.
Don't be afraid to expose vampires
The best way to boost his self-confidence is to point out the people and things that lower his self-esteem. If it's a family member or really close friend, this can be quite difficult. You won't be able to force him to stop communicating with such a person, but you should still open your partner's eyes and warn him that such interaction has a bad effect on his self-esteem.
Show that it's okay to laugh at yourself
The ability to relieve tension is a gift, and your partner may not have it. If you can laugh at yourself for doing something stupid, he can learn it from you. Lack of confidence cannot be compensated for with humor, but the negative effect will be significantly reduced.
Show affection and support in public
Showing support and affection in front of family, friends and even strangers can be a huge help when it comes to self-esteem. Always support him if you want to improve his self-esteem.
Don't make it worse for him
If he doesn't get results as quickly as you would like, you may feel irritated. But you shouldn't take it out on your partner. If you make him feel like there's something wrong with him because he's not very confident, he's unlikely to feel good about himself. Moreover, it may undo all previous efforts.
Convince him to get help
If you notice that his lack of self-confidence is no longer just a burden to you, but also an obstacle to achieving his goals, the best thing to do is to convince your partner to get help. Therapy can help overcome the problem itself and give a new outlook on life.
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