Ways to overcome the motivational barrier in communication. What is a psychological barrier and how to overcome it? Methods of psychological influence

The only way to motivate people to be energetic is to communicate with them.

Lee Iacocca

They condemn what they do not understand.

Quintilian

A typical mistake in assessing the communication process is formulated as follows: “I said what I wanted to say, he understood what I said.” It's an illusion. In fact, the partner understands everything, firstly, differently, and secondly, in his own way.

IN business communication Very specific barriers may arise between partners. The reasons for their appearance are different. In order to prevent things from becoming stressful, you need to learn to prevent the emergence of barriers in communication, and if they do arise, to successfully overcome them.

Let's consider the main barriers that arise on the path to fruitful communication.

Barriers to interaction.Motivational barrier arises if partners have different motives for entering into contact, for example: one is interested in developing a common business, while the other is only interested in immediate profit. In this case, it is better to find out each other’s intentions from the very beginning and agree on the motives for cooperation. If this fails, the collaboration is doomed to fail.

Barrier of incompetence. The partner's incompetence causes a feeling of frustration and a feeling of wasted time. If the partner does not understand the problem at all, it is better to politely “curtail” the conversation; if he has partial knowledge of the issue, and there is no one else to turn to, you need to bring him up to date without emphasizing your great knowledge.

Ethical barrier occurs when interaction with a partner is hampered by his moral position, which is incompatible with yours. Everyone decides for themselves whether to compromise, but trying to re-educate or shame a partner is not recommended.

Each person has their own communication style. It depends on temperament, character, worldview and is formed under the influence of upbringing, environment, and profession. Therefore, in business communication there can often be communication style barrier. The content of the communication style is

· the predominant motive of communication (interaction, self-affirmation, emotional support of the interlocutor, etc.);

· attitude towards other people (gentleness, goodwill, tolerance, cruelty, rationalism, egocentrism, prejudice, etc.);

· attitude towards oneself (narcissism, recognition of one’s shortcomings, defending the “honor of the uniform”, imposing one’s opinion, etc.);

· the nature of the influence on people (pressure, coercion, manipulation, cooperation, personal example, non-interference, etc.).

How can you ensure that your partner’s communication style does not become an obstacle to communicating with him? It is necessary to realize that a person’s behavior style is a manifestation of his deep essential characteristics, and. if it does not interfere with the matter, it should be accepted, whatever our attitude may be.

Barriers to perception and understanding.Aesthetic barrier occurs when the partner is untidy, sloppily dressed or the situation in his office or the appearance of his desk are not conducive to conversation.

It is difficult to overcome the internal obstacle to conversation, and nevertheless, if this contact is very necessary, we cannot show that something offends us. Comfortable communication can be hampered by different social status of partners,

especially if one of them is used to being in awe of their superiors. The following pre-conversation attitude helps to get rid of this attitude: “The boss is a person just like me. He has all human weaknesses. I have no reason to worry. I will speak calmly and simply, hoping for understanding. I respect myself and my business, and he will feel it.” occurs when communicating with an upset person. If a partner who is usually polite to you greets you unkindly, talks without raising his eyes, etc., do not rush to take it personally: maybe he is not able to cope with a bad mood due to the course of his own affairs, family troubles and so on. It is necessary, when arriving at a meeting in advance, to try to find out what the situation is at the company and what mood the business partner is in. Sometimes it is better to reschedule the conversation for another time. If this is not possible, then at the beginning of the conversation you need to help your partner improve his emotional state.

State of health of a person, physical or spiritual, also affects how a person communicates.

It is not difficult for observant people to guess from external signs what is happening to a person, to choose the appropriate tone, words, or to shorten the time of communication so as not to tire the interlocutor who is unwell. Psychological protection,

built by a business partner is a serious communication barrier. Having realized that the barrier in communicating with an inconvenient employee or partner is caused by his desire to defend himself, try to change your attitude towards him, and the difficulties in communicating with such a person will gradually disappear. Installation barrier.

Your business partner may have a negative attitude towards you or the company you represent. If you encounter an installation barrier, it is better not to try to convince your partner. Calmly regard hostility as a manifestation of ignorance, weakness, lack of culture, simple lack of awareness. Then the unfair attitude will not affect you, and soon it will disappear altogether, since your deeds and actions will force your partner to change his mind. Double barrier

lies in the fact that we involuntarily judge each person by ourselves, we expect from a business partner the same act that we would do in his place. But he's different. His position in this situation is determined by his moral standards and attitudes. To prevent the double barrier from arising, it is necessary to develop the ability to decenter.Communication barriers. Semantic barrier occurs when business partners use the same signs (including words) to designate completely different things. The reasons for this barrier are varied. To overcome the semantic barrier, it is necessary to understand the characteristics of the partner and use vocabulary that is understandable to him;, it is necessary to explain in what sense you used this or that word.

Inability to express one's thoughts (logical barrier) really interferes with communication. Helvetius said: “It takes much more intelligence to convey your ideas than to have them... This is proven by the fact that there are many people who are considered smart, but write very bad essays.” You need to be patient and use all your listening skills, ask questions in order to get from your partner necessary information.

Poor speaking technique (phonetic barrier) very disturbing effective communication. But if you are interested in contact with this particular partner, you will have to adapt to his manner of speaking and not show that you are dissatisfied with something.

Inability to listen manifests itself in the fact that the partner interrupts, begins to talk about his own things, or goes into his own thoughts and does not react to your words at all (for more details, see Listening in business communications). You can compensate for your partner’s inability to listen only with your art of speaking.

Modality barrier occurs when a person does not think about the priority channel for perceiving information (for more details, see Verbal means of communication). Knowing that each person has a certain priority channel of perception makes us more tolerant, and the ability to determine it allows us to find an adequate language of communication with a specific interlocutor, making contact with him not only conflict-free, but also effective. In order to avoid a barrier of modalities in communication, it is necessary to transmit information in the modality in which it is easiest for the partner to perceive it, in the form in which it is understandable to him.

Character barrier also creates difficulties in communication. Each person has his own character, but well-mannered people know how to behave in such a way that their character does not become a source of conflict. Not everyone, however, wants and knows how to understand themselves and control themselves. People with pronounced temperamental characteristics can be awkward interlocutors .

Impoliteness - This is the barrier that prevents you from correctly perceiving your partner, understanding what he says, and interacting with him. Unfortunately, manifestations of bad manners are not uncommon even in business communications. Impolite treatment can be stopped by calm, without irritation, your own politeness. There are situations when you are forced to listen to fair or unfair expressions of indignation.

· Remember that your goal is cooperation, not conflict. When a person is rude, there is a desire to immediately put him in his place. But this can lead to altercations. It is better to answer in a cool and calm tone. For many this has a sobering effect. There are other ways to calm an indignant interlocutor:"alien role" technique:

· if the interlocutor is indignant or shouts, try to get into his position, look at the situation through his eyes; once you say to a person “I understand you” - and the opportunity arises to conduct a constructive conversation; compassionate attitude towards your partner

: remember that admitting that your interlocutor is right and sympathizing with him usually extinguishes the fire of indignation; · tense situations can be defused and as a joke

· , but it will give the desired effect only when you are sure that your partner has a sense of humor; removal technique: you can unobtrusively examine the screamer, focusing on some little detail in his suit or hairstyle; you can think about his age, marital status, favorite pastime; It is also useful to analyze speech: features pronunciation of words

, richness of vocabulary, intonation, successful speech patterns, errors in the pronunciation of words and the construction of phrases.

These techniques allow you to endure adverse effects without stress.

Having discharged himself and not turned you on, your partner usually feels awkward and even feels guilty. In this state, he is ready to continue contact. And now it all depends on your desire to communicate with this person. To avoid a barrier of impoliteness in communicating with you, be attentive to your partner from the very first minute of the conversation. How to overcome communication barriers? First of all, develop self-esteem and self-confidence.

It also helps to be able to see behind every inappropriate action of a person a manifestation of his

· psychological characteristics, and maybe even problems. Our typical mistakes:: if we don’t know a person enough, only some of his positive or negative traits, then we often complete his image as positive or negative, and then connect our expectations with the image we created) ;

· it seems to us that our partner should guess how we feel(it’s better to immediately clearly formulate your expectations, explain the reasons, etc.) ;

· we don’t catch the subtext of the conversation(often we do not assume that the partner may also not directly express his desires and true mood) ;

· if a person’s behavior is unpleasant to us, it seems to us that he treats us badly or even does it to spite us(the reason may be completely different; people are usually upset and irritated by unfair accusations of bad attitude, it turns out that we ourselves provoke the conflict) ;

· we try to meet the expectations of the interlocutor(in communication with a good man this leads to an unnatural relationship, which is often revealed at the most inopportune moment; if we follow the manipulator’s lead, the consequences are even worse.) .

Life confronts us with different people. And he very rarely gives gifts to those with whom barriers do not arise in communication. Therefore, you should be lenient towards manifestations of lack of communication and be able to make communication conflict-free. To overcome barriers in communication, you need to make a “diagnosis” for yourself or your partner and structure your behavior in such a way as to reduce or eliminate the barrier.

Questions for self-control

1. What are communication barriers?

2. Name the main characteristics of a logical barrier and ways to overcome them.

3. Name the main characteristics of the barrier of perception and understanding and ways to overcome it.

4. Name the main characteristics of the semantic barrier and ways to overcome it.

5. Name the main characteristics of the phonetic barrier and ways to overcome it.

6. Name the main characteristics of the interaction barrier and ways to overcome it.

Exercise 1

Determine whether you have the skills of a pleasant person to talk to:

· Do you know how to say hello so that they smile back at you?

· Do you know how to interrupt a protracted conversation in such a way that the interlocutor does not get offended by you?

· Do you know how to defuse a situation with a joke and cool simmering passions?

· Do you know how to refuse a person who has approached you with a tactless or untimely request in such a way as not to break off the relationship with him?

· If someone is rude to you, can you not respond with rudeness? Are you able to calmly respond to a rude person or otherwise confront him?

· Do you know how to say goodbye in such a way that you want to see you again?

Task 2

Tell us about your experience of overcoming communication barriers. Discuss problematic situations.

Task 3

Euphemisms are soft equivalents of rather harsh words or expressions that are preferably veiled, for example, instead of “he died” - “he passed away”, “poor” - “needy”, “old man” - “an elderly person”, etc. P. Come up with at least 10 words that are unpleasant for your partner and choose euphemisms for them.

Task 4

Name polite forms of making a request ( please be so kind etc.), then polite forms of refusal ( Unfortunately, I can’t help you; it's not in my power and so on.)

Remember the preference in certain situations for requests in the subjunctive mood ( I would like to), answer according to the formula yes, but....

Find formulas for request and refusal that are appropriate in communication with a colleague, with a superior person, with a client of the company.

Task 5

Break into pairs. One partner must come up with a tactless request, the other must refuse this request, but in such a way as not to be considered a bore and not to interrupt the relationship with the person.

Task 6

Working on correct speech.

1. Comment on errors in expressions: criminal crime, vacancy, price list, souvenir, future prospects, bold risk, first premiere, my autobiography, first baptism of fire, timekeeping.

2. Eliminate verbosity in expressions: every minute of time, step back, in the month of December, meet for the first time, bequeath as an inheritance, in summer period time, an erroneous delusion.

3. Explain the meaning of paronymous words and come up with phrases with the words: compare and contrast; put on and dress; effective and efficient;

economical and economical; ignorant and ignorant; bath and tub; single and ordinary; test and try; present and provide; shareholder and shareholder; layout and planning; subscriber and subscription; manage and manage; addressee and addressee; parliamentarian and parliamentarian. 4. Explain the meaning of the words:

import, priority, harmonize, confidential, extension, legitimacy, adequate, consensus, mentality, reputation, dividend, plebiscite.

Task 7

Work through possible spelling errors in words:

1) catalog, quarter, more beautiful, aristocracy;

2) partnership liability, long ago, partner;

3) inquire, expert, phenomenon, convening a session;

5) wholesale prices, gross income, prospects;

6) unrestrained, start, rattle, gas pipeline, oil pipeline;

7) owners, briefly, litigation, closely;

8) rings, bent, intention, intercessor;

9) petition, inquire, pantry;

10) language sausage, language error, thieves, in the back, you are right;

11) simultaneous, deepen, vulgarize, normalize;

12) scissors, read, light, some;

13) intend, take into account;

14) form, chaos, arrived, long-standing;

15) expired, being, debate, fairway;

16) test, pace, dispensary, demagoguery;

17) trend, claim, contender, neckline;

18) competent (or [pent]), ascertain (or [stant]), escort (or escort), legal adviser (or legal consultant), unprecedented (or [tsen]).

Task 8

1. Conjugate verbs understand, begin, accept in the past tense, and the verb want- in present time.

2. How to do it correctly: so much or so much, wear glasses or dress, ridicule or laugh?

3. Correct the expressions: talking about life, walking along the roads, Tolya and I.

4. Decline nouns: elections, means.

6. Correct expressions: more beautiful, lighter, better, cheaper.

Task 9

Edit the phrases, explain the error in the construction of the sentence.

1. The meeting was held with great interest.

2. I noticed a characteristic error.

3. I would like you to give your attention to our organization as soon as possible.

4. He tried to warn the director about the wrong step.

5. A representative from the plant was also present at the meeting.

6. Having processed this data, a complete picture of the state of affairs emerged.

7. My opinion of him as a person is not bad.

9. The issue of resources was on the agenda.

10. While going up the stairs, a strange announcement caught my eye.

11. I'm tired of wasting my nerves on this question.

12. I understood what hint they gave me.

13. We have the cheapest prices for goods.

14. I don't want to escalate the situation.

15. Nikolai was waiting for me in the corridor.

16. I have repeatedly noted that it is necessary to follow the instructions.

17. All this affects work.

18. Let me raise this toast to our successes.

Task 10

Explain the meaning of popular expressions and phraseological units: apple of discord, Sisyphean labor, Gordian knot, Augean stables, play the first violin, stew in your own juice, remove the shavings, through a tree stump, speak with your teeth, lead by the nose, put it on the line.

Task 11. “Marriage announcements”

Each participant receives a card with the name of an object that has characteristic properties: to complete its existence, it needs another object that complements it. Each participant in the game pronounces the text of the “marriage announcement” on behalf of his subject. In the first part of the ad you need to present your item: describe its appearance, the most character traits, Interests and hobbies; the second part of the ad is an “order” for a future life partner: his appearance, character traits, interests.

The ad is drawn up correctly if it was possible to find those main features of the object and its “halves”, the combination of which forms a strong union that will fill the “life” of both with meaning. You need to listen carefully so as not to miss your match.

Previous

A psychological barrier is a specific state of a person that does not allow him to achieve what he wants or take an active position. Very often, when in a company, people cannot freely carry on a conversation, voice their thoughts, or do things that seem simple at first glance. The inability to step over yourself and do what you want due to inexplicable internal fears and experiences is a psychological barrier.

Every person has encountered one type of psychological barrier more than once in his life (we create them on a subconscious level). There is nothing wrong with this if everything is within reason and under control. The presence of such a problem cannot be ignored if a person is constantly in a stressed and constrained state, because limitations in movement and communication make him withdrawn, irritated and unhappy. Self-doubt, low self-esteem, internal fears and internal conflict with oneself are the main reasons for this problem, but not always.

There are several types of psychological barriers that have their own differences and characteristics.

Types of psychological barriers

1. One of the most common options is “First Impression”. Almost every person has built a psychological barrier in front of themselves more than once without realizing it. It happens that when meeting for the first time (or visiting an unfamiliar place or company) people do not like their opponents. In this case, the behavior of an active and cheerful person becomes completely opposite. A silent position, reluctance to actively take part in games (dancing, discussions), complete immersion in one’s own thoughts and the desire to quickly end the acquaintance – this is precisely the “first impression” barrier.
2. Conflict in thinking styles. Each of us is an individual with his own perception life situations and having your own opinion. Voicing your thoughts and entering into an argument with your interlocutor about their correctness entails conflict situation and an unpleasant aftertaste. Quite often, after loud and long discussions, everyone remains unconvinced, but tension and misperception arise between opponents (each builds a personal barrier regarding the other).
3. Mismatch of temperaments is another type that leads to the emergence of a barrier. Quite often, a clash between a hot-tempered and overly active choleric person and a slow phlegmatic person can create a psychological barrier. Without even suspecting it, it is phlegmatic people who most often build a defense out of fear of an overly impulsive and gesticulating interlocutor. A similar situation exists between melancholics and sanguine people, optimists and pessimists. Of course, there are practically no pure temperaments. Depending on a person’s ability and desire to adapt and hear another, his feelings of comfort and the absence (or presence) of barriers in communication directly depend.
4. The difference in goals is another reason that puts everything in its place. In the same situation, people can have completely different goals. Example: A family goes on vacation to the country. My husband strives to spend all his time fishing. The wife hopes to plant a vegetable garden and hopes for help from her husband and son. The child generally initially agreed to meet with friends. Despite the fact that everyone is heading to the same place, everyone has their own plans, and no one wants to give in. It is precisely because of the inability to listen to the interlocutor and compromise that a psychological barrier in communication arises.
5. A moral barrier is another type that arises due to hostility to certain behavior of people (rudeness, impudence, deceit, etc.). The presence of a psychological barrier is not always a negative phenomenon, but if it happens constantly, regardless of the situation and social circle, it is worth taking some measures to help solve the problem.

Ways to overcome

1. You should learn to understand yourself (feel at what exact moment a barrier begins to build) and others (see their behavior and recognize other people’s barriers).
2. Try to create a comfortable atmosphere during communication. If you notice that a particular topic causes a clash of characters and opinions, it is better to switch to something more optimistic, light and relaxed.
3. Active use of a sense of humor always helps to relax and promotes fun dialogue.
4. Overly impulsive individuals should exercise some control over their loud speech and active gestures.
5. Attending social and psychological trainings.

Communication has long ago become an integral part of our lives. At work, while studying, in transport, at home, on the Internet - you never know where else! It takes up the lion's share of our time. And everything would have been fine if not for the communication barriers. It is they, these annoying obstacles, that prevent us from receiving pleasure and benefit from it. These barriers arise in a wide variety of situations and in almost every person. Therefore, in order to achieve success in life, you need to have a good understanding of what communication barriers are and how to overcome them.

What are the difficulties in communication?

Probably, each of you has had the feeling that the interlocutor seemed to be defending himself, erecting an invisible wall between you. This wall is the very notorious barrier. Where do they come from? Communication barriers appear in our lives for various reasons - as a rule, they are a close interweaving of the characteristics of our characters and situations. And sometimes you can’t figure out who or what is to blame.

As mentioned above, almost every person has encountered problems in various communication situations, regardless of their gender, age, social status, values ​​and attitudes. This can only mean one thing - the reasons why communication barriers arise are different, and they are present in the life of every person.

These reasons may or may not be realized by communicating people. This largely determines how quickly these people will notice that they have problems, understand what kind of problems they are and finally be able to solve them. By the way, barriers to communication may even be created by one or more interlocutors - and even this is enough to cause failures in interaction with each other.

It must be said that some barriers may be more common than others in certain people and in certain situations. They may be characteristic of a certain gender, age, profession, nationality, culture, situation. Each of these patterns is worthy of separate consideration, but we will not do this within the scope of our article.

So, what are the main types of communication barriers?

Communication barriers. These are barriers to communication associated with the exchange of information between interlocutors during communication. What are they?

• Semantic barrier. It gets in your way when you and your interlocutor mean completely different things by the same concepts. Such a barrier arises almost always and everywhere, because We understand many things very differently. For example, for one girl good husband- this is someone who loves her, takes care of her, earns enough money, wants a child, loves spending time with her; and for the other - the one who rarely drinks and rarely hits her. Therefore, speaking on the same topic - “how all men are the same!” – they will actually talk about different things and may encounter misunderstandings of each other. In order to destroy this barrier, it is necessary to understand well the partner and his picture of the world - the meanings that he puts into various concepts. In case of possible inaccuracies, always explain in detail what you mean and try to use words and phrases that the interlocutor understands.
• Logical barrier. Essentially, it is the inability to express one's thoughts. In the speech of such a person, cause-and-effect relationships are confused and concepts are substituted. Or it may be difficult for him to find words for those complex thoughts that run through his head. If you encounter such an interlocutor, then be patient: listen to him very carefully and ask questions - this will help you get the necessary information. If you yourself are guilty of this peculiarity, then it is better to try to get rid of it. Listen to how good speakers or writers express their thoughts, read a textbook on logic, sign up for public speaking courses, or simply ask friends to give you feedback with recommendations - any of these options will help you become a more attractive interlocutor.
• Phonetic barrier. This is a bad speaking technique - when it is not clear what the interlocutor is saying, and this interferes with the perception of information. If you are interested in communicating with this person, then there are several options. During formal or business communication, you will have to adapt to his manner of speaking, occasionally asking again in unclear moments. In informal or friendly communication, you can gently convey to your interlocutor that it is difficult for you to understand him due to some features of his speech. Ask him, if possible, to adapt to you and adjust them.
• Modality barrier. We all receive information from the world through five senses, but one of them has priority. This is your modality. For example, people with a visual modality best assimilate information they see, but information they hear is much worse. Knowing this, try to immediately determine the modality of your interlocutor and use it: show graphs and diagrams to the visual learner, play with your voice with the auditory learner, and touch the kinesthetic learner more often and show everything “on your fingers.” Use appropriate verbs in your speech - for example, “see”, “hear” or “feel”.
• Personal barrier. Each of us has a character, and some of its traits may not suit someone. But for some, these traits are so sharp that their character can be a barrier to communication. This may be due to ignorance of one's own characteristics or a lack of self-control. For example, excessive slowness or, conversely, fussiness can irritate communication partners. In case you yourself encounter such a person, try to communicate your discomfort and ask him to be slower or faster. Well, try to perceive adequately own shortcomings, because For some, they too can become a barrier.

Barriers to interaction. These are barriers associated with interaction with a person during communication and arising from dissatisfaction with the behavior of a communication partner. As a rule, there are significant differences in the positions of the interlocutors.

• Motivational barrier. It occurs when communication partners have different motives for entering into contact. For example, you want support from a friend, and she wants you to discuss her new dress. In this case, you may encounter misunderstandings and even quarrel. To prevent this from happening, it will be useful to indicate your own motives in time: “You know, now I really need you to support me, and then we’ll discuss the dress.”
• Barrier of incompetence. Often found in working together. You may be angry at your partner's incompetence when he starts saying stupid things that are obvious to you. This causes feelings of anger, frustration and wasted time. You have two options - either gradually push him to a deeper understanding of the issue (for example, by unobtrusively explaining something), or curtail communication. The choice is yours, and it depends on your goals.
• Ethical barrier. It occurs in a situation of incompatibility between the moral positions of communication partners. The main thing is not to try to re-educate or ridicule your interlocutor. It is much more correct to curtail communication or try to find some kind of compromise, especially if you have some important common goal.
• Communication style barrier. Each of us has our own unique style. It depends on temperament, character, upbringing, profession and other factors. As a rule, it takes a long time to form, and then it becomes difficult to change. Communication style includes the main motive (why are you communicating - self-affirmation, support, etc....), attitude towards others (kindness, tolerance, cruelty...), attitude towards oneself and the nature of the influence on people (pressure, manipulation, persuasion and etc...). Most often, we simply have to accept another person’s communication style, since it is difficult to change, and communication is often necessary.

Barriers to understanding and perception. These are barriers associated with perceiving and knowing each other, as well as establishing mutual understanding on this basis.

• Aesthetic barrier. It occurs when we don’t like the way our interlocutor looks. For its occurrence there is different reasons, for example, if he is untidy or sloppily dressed or something in his appearance annoys us. It can be difficult not to think about it, but it is necessary, because this contact can be very important for us.
• Social barrier. Difficulties in communication can be caused by different social status partners. However, it is important to remember here that the appearance of such a barrier is primarily associated with attitudes in the minds of the interlocutors. If they give importance social status each other and for them it can be an obstacle; it can complicate communication. But for many situations, status is not important - for example, to discuss some of your favorite activities or support each other.
• Barrier of negative emotions. Agree, it is quite difficult to communicate with an upset or angry person. Many of us tend to take these emotions personally (at least partially). Here it is necessary to remember that often the reason for the bad mood of the interlocutor lies in some other things - the situation in the family, problems at work or a personal crisis. However, if the negative emotions of the interlocutor significantly impede the conversation, it is better to postpone it for another time.
• Installation barrier. Very often, communication is complicated if your partner initially does not have a very good opinion of you. In most cases, the best thing to do would be to discuss this issue and honestly ask your interlocutor about it, try to explain to him that he is mistaken. In situations where this is impossible, just try to take this fact into account and build your communication with your partner quite carefully. When some time passes and he realizes that his attitude is not supported by anything, it may disappear by itself.
• The “double” barrier. It lies in the fact that we involuntarily think of our interlocutor as ourselves: we attribute to him our opinions and views and expect from him the same actions that we ourselves would do. But he is different! It is important not to forget about this and try to perceive and remember everything that distinguishes him from us.
• Rudeness and ignorance. We all encounter people who are simply poorly mannered. Sometimes you just need to endure such treatment, especially when a person does not respond to comments. It is very important to remain polite in such a situation - sometimes this in itself stops rudeness. Remember that you have some kind of goal in communicating with such a person, and this is clearly not the desire to put him in his place.
• Inability to listen. It manifests itself as a lack of interest in what you are saying, an urge to talk about yourself, or constant interruption. If in such a situation you need a bloody nose to be listened to, try to speak better. Use various ways attracting attention: intonation, facial expressions, gestures, basics of NLP.

Who is he, a person who regularly encounters communication barriers?

We told you about the main barriers that prevent people from having fruitful communication. However, have you noticed that some people constantly have some difficulties related to communication, while for others everything goes like clockwork? Indeed, there are types of character that significantly complicate interaction with other people. As a rule, such a person behaves in a similar way in completely different situations. And then he himself complains that no one wants to communicate with him. In this case, the personality of this person acts as a barrier to communication.

What are the main features of this character? First of all, it is necessary to talk about such a feature as global mistrust. Such a person does not trust himself, nor people, nor the world in general. He is suspicious and opposed to others. As a rule, he achieves his goals at the expense of other people. At the same time, he is often torn apart by internal contradictions, which he is not very aware of. A person who is unsuccessful in communication is characterized by self-centeredness, authoritarianism and a tendency to manipulate.

He loves to be praised when he gets what he has long wanted. He has possessive traits. If his desires are not satisfied, he gets angry, but at the same time he almost never helps other people achieve their goals and does not sympathize with them. Such a person is emotionally unstable, and his mood often changes. Those around him describe him as irritable and hot-tempered, but internally cold. He often experiences negative emotions and has low levels of self-control.

This person does not understand others and their feelings well. He is insensitive to what happens to them and has low insight and observation. He is not given the opportunity to understand that something else may be important to the interlocutor or that he understands the meaning of this or that phrase differently. Often he is not able to predict and evaluate the future. He is characterized by timidity, isolation, self-doubt, alienation, passivity, and lack of initiative. Usually such a person turns out to be intolerant, poorly educated and ignorant. At the same time, he thinks in very rigid categories and frameworks, and the surrounding reality should not go beyond them. He has a lot of stereotypes. He is envious and at the same time vain. Expects a lot from other people, prone to outbursts of jealousy.

He does not know how to give reasons for his statements, choose an adequate form for them, or establish and stop contact with others. Unsuccessful in communication, a person does not know how to give good feedback. He talks a lot and listens little, periodically makes unacceptably long pauses in his speech, likes to interrupt his interlocutors and then “slow down” (this is due to the fact that his vocabulary does not correspond to what he wants to say). Social norms are often incomprehensible to him - he does not know how to keep his distance, and is prone to blackmail, lies, pressure and aggression. Most often in communication he uses the following strategies: defense and avoidance of communication, devaluation of the opinions of others and aggression, control over others or excessive formalism. Such a person can be described as immature, infantile, and sometimes immoral.

As a rule, this person is not very happy with his life and successes. Any failures cause anger and aggression in him, as a result of which he often tries to achieve his goals by some immoral means. He doesn't value himself or other people. He lacks the ability to truly love and form close relationships, so he usually does not have friends and loved ones.

Indeed, the psychological portrait we have drawn is terrible and reminiscent of the image of some kind of criminal or outcast. But in one sense or another, this is true. Constant difficulties in communication are a symptom that a person has something wrong within himself. But it is far from certain that he will have all the traits and features listed above. The psychological portrait written above is collective, and it includes a great many different people with a common problem. Therefore, in life you can only observe some individual features and characteristics.

Difficulties in communication and life situation

However, everything depends not only on the personality and character of a person. There are situations in which almost all of us become uncomfortable. This is reflected in all our behavior, including communication with other people. In this case, the barrier is the situation that caused discomfort and its characteristics.

Finding yourself in such circumstances, all participants in communication feel uncomfortable. Some people are aware of this to a greater extent, and others to a lesser extent. At the same time, they do not just feel it - by accident or on purpose they prevent each other from satisfying their desires and achieving the goals of communication. As a result of this, everyone is worried, angry, does not understand each other, and is generally tense. Most often this happens in situations of restriction, refusal, blame and insult (which, in general, is not surprising).

On the one hand, collective memory takes its toll. Humanity in general and the inhabitants of Russia in particular have repeatedly experienced suppression, repression, war, and famine. Therefore, insults, accusations, restrictions and refusals are very clearly imprinted in the minds of people, who subsequently use them more and more often to resolve conflicts, overcome obstacles, gain power and even seek happiness. This is becoming a typical way for an entire nation to react, globally speaking.

On the other hand, having such a negative memory becomes unnecessary when we have such a rich culture of aggression. Probably each of you will agree that in modern society a lot of attention is paid to aggression. All kinds of media are especially guilty of this - television, newspapers, magazines, the Internet, advertising companies. The culture of aggression is also gaining everything great popularity thanks to some features of our life: overcrowding in schools, hospitals and prisons, high unemployment, low qualifications of people working with the population, low salaries and lack of career prospects, corruption, poor quality of government work and much more, which you know firsthand. You all face this and know that these situations are always fraught with barriers to communication.

How to understand that a barrier has appeared in communication?

Of course, being inside the situation, this is not difficult to do. In the process of difficult communication, you experience discomfort, distrust of your partner, you cannot open up, show emotions, you do not know what to say - in general, such communication cannot be called easy. However, if you need to assess the presence of psychological barriers, then knowledge of how people behave in situations of difficult communication will be very useful.

Our non-verbal language acts as such an external indicator. Hostility, craving for power and dominance, insincerity and the desire to stand out are especially clearly manifested in it. As we already wrote above, our subject who is unsuccessful in communication can experience this whole gamut of feelings and desires. In what specific signs are all its negative traits manifested?

1. First is eye contact. In the case of communication barriers, they are usually rare, low-intensity, and sometimes completely absent. Glances at the partner may be present (sometimes even prolonged), but they all occur at the moment of active communication - especially when the interlocutor expresses something unpleasant, but important. Moreover, if the interlocutor begins to look away, sensing something is wrong, our “subject” will immediately try to pretend to be a sweetheart and look into them - but this look will actually be cold and hard.
2. Secondly, it's posture. Having felt difficulties in communication, people often take either unnatural, angular and tense postures, or, on the contrary, inadequately relaxed, sometimes even slack. Very often the body position is closed (crossed arms, legs, body turns away from the interlocutor) or “elevated” (the desire to sit higher, look down at the interlocutor).
3. Thirdly, gestures. As a rule, they are sharp and intense, which is also unnatural. There is a clearly expressed desire to hide your hands (for example, in your pockets or behind your back), clench your hands into fists, “grab” or take up more space for yourself through posture and gestures. This may be interspersed with private touching of oneself and another.
4. Fourthly, facial expressions. The face often expresses tension. The facial expressions are strange - for example, the mouth can smile, but the eyes remain motionless. In general, the face is characterized by expressions that demonstrate distrust and hostility towards the interlocutor, as well as contempt and anger.

Of course, a person experiencing communication difficulties does not always behave this way. These are only the most typical and striking markers, and from them one can conclude not only that there are barriers to interaction, but also about the interlocutors themselves - about their attitude towards each other and about their goals and guidelines in communication.

http://youtu.be/fcT_0gI-dn8

How to overcome communication difficulties?

So, we moved on to the most interesting part - how to step over psychological barriers. Difficulties in communication are not an easy thing, but they can be overcome. "How?" - you ask. And we will tell you about some ways and techniques to overcome communication barriers.

Watch your appearance. This doesn't mean you always have to look like a movie star on the red carpet. On the contrary, in many situations it will be pretentious and unnatural. Your appearance should be attractive. This is facilitated by neatness, neatness and the ability to wear things that really suit you.

The manner of communication should be appropriate to the situation and people. Agree, it will be bad move, if at a disco you communicate with everyone with restraint and sternly, and at negotiations - cheerfully and without distance. Consider the characteristics of your interlocutor: his age, gender, upbringing, character and views. For example, you should not wear a short skirt to meet a Muslim.

Try to put yourself in the shoes of your communication partner and try to understand his point of view. As you probably already understand, we are all different from each other. The same things have completely different meanings for us, and we understand them just as differently. This is where most of the barriers come from. Most The right way The solution to such problems is to allow the other to be different and different from you, and also try to understand his position, even if you do not agree with it.

Train empathy and sensitivity. This, accordingly, is the ability to empathize with other people and feel what is happening to them down to the smallest changes in their condition. These two traits are the key to success in communication.

Don't expect from your partners what they can't give you. This way you only cause resentment in yourself and guilt in others for what was not given to you. Try to want real things from your partners that match their characteristics, and tell them about your expectations.

Don’t try to fully meet your partner’s expectations yourself. Firstly, it is boring, and secondly, it is very difficult, and it is impossible to exist like this for a long time. It’s better to be as natural as possible, but taking into account the interlocutor and social norms.

Watch your words. Your messages should be logically connected, contain information that is interesting to the interlocutor, and be based on something common - for example, a general understanding of the meaning of words or some kind of minimal common memory. Your speech should be understandable to the interlocutor both in the literal sense and in the sense of being consistent with his or her horizons.

Be open and honest about your thoughts, feelings and expectations. If you are asked for something, and you are already sure of your refusal, it is better to voice it immediately. This way, neither you nor the interlocutor will waste time and resources.
The “look from the outside” technique. Sometimes, in order to understand something (for example, to realize what exactly is interfering with your communication with your partner), you need to look at the situation from the outside, describe it in abstract words without introducing your emotions and personal characteristics.

Respect your partner. Even if he annoys you incredibly, try to be creative and find something that will make you respect him. It could be some little thing, for example, his manner of emphasizing intonation individual words. Or something more serious - for example, a very rude person who spends half of his income on charity. You can find something good and worthy of respect in any person, and if you can’t do this, then you should think about it – do you really need this communication?

NATA KARLIN

Communication is such a familiar category of people’s existence in society that we simply stop noticing it. Without communication, a person, and not only a person (any living creature living in a particular society) cannot imagine himself. People communicate at home, on the street, in transport, at work, etc. We are accustomed to hearing speech and understanding it, and if we don’t understand it, then we learn the language, and so on. However, it is not so much language barriers that become an obstacle to communication between people; there are psychological barriers to communication. You can “cross” them yourself, you just need to know how to do it right.

Difficulties and types of communication barriers

Have you ever talked to someone who clearly doesn't want to talk to you? It’s not clear why, there is an invisible wall between you and him, through which not only no information comes from him, but, as it seems to you, he understands little of your speech. It is this invisible barrier that is called a barrier to communication in psychology. There are many sources for this reason:

Person's character;
Upbringing;
The level of education;
Age;
Status in society;
The current situation and more.

It should be noted with confidence that every person living on planet Earth has encountered this problem.

In the process of communication, the reasons that put a barrier between people can be conscious or unconscious. Conscious reasons are those that a person can explain to himself and his interlocutor. Unconscious, when people cannot understand and explain the origins of communication disorders. It is especially difficult to establish contact if both partners have communication difficulties.

So, what types of barriers does psychology divide communication into?

Semantic barrier

A similar barrier arises from different interpretations of words and concepts with which the interlocutor operates. This is the most common barrier, because for all people the same things are interpreted differently. For one man, the best wife is a housewife, the mother of his children, smart and beautiful, and for the second, she is the one who does not contradict him and silently sits at home with the children, without the right to vote. Therefore, the statement from men that all women are the same sounds differently. They say the same phrase, but it sounds different for everyone. Realizing that they have not found a common direction in the conversation, the interlocutors face a barrier on the path to mutual understanding and agreement. To overcome this particular barrier, the interlocutors must have an idea of ​​the world and life in which the opponent lives. You need to know the interlocutor’s turns of speech, his manner of expressing thoughts, so that there are no discrepancies in the spoken phrases. If you see that your interlocutor is confused, trying to decipher the thought that you put into this or that phrase, take your time, stop your monologue, and explain to your partner what you meant. Decipher the words and concepts that most people use in order to convey the idea to your interlocutor as clearly as possible.

Logical barrier

Logical obstacles in a conversation are, and then express them using verbal communication. These are people who cannot find the words to express a certain situation or are unable to cope with the flow of thoughts and emotions flying through their brain. The reasons for such manifestations may be the following factors:

When faced with such a person, be patient, listen to him with Olympian calm, and ask. Only in this case will you be able to wait for the “rational grain” of everything you hear. If you are such a person yourself, follow these rules:

Listen carefully to those people who know how to speak beautifully. Surely, among your friends there are such people;
Buy educational literature. It could be tutorial on logic or a master class on the art of public speaking;
Take a public speaking course.

Ask your friends to help you overcome the logic barrier through “feedback” and their recommendations.

Phonetic barrier

This expression of one’s thoughts is not accurate and is not clear to the opponent. This makes it very difficult to perceive the information you convey. If you suspect that your speaking technique is not professional enough, but you need to keep the attention of your interlocutor at all costs, there are several recommendations:

Barriers in business communication can be overcome in the following way: listen to your interlocutor and adapt to his manner of expressing thoughts and speaking. It will be especially kind of you on the topic of conversation;
Barriers in informal communication It’s easier to step over - you explain to your interlocutor that you don’t understand him, and together you look for a way out of the situation. You just need to do this very gently and tactfully so that

Modality barrier

A person is able to perceive the world using the five senses:

Vision;
Hearing;
Smell;
Touch;
Taste.

However, for each person there is a priority organ, based on the perception of which we draw our own picture of the world. This is called modality. A person with an auditory modality perceives visual or tactile information with a lesser degree of intelligibility. To determine the modality of the interlocutor, graphs, turn on audio recordings or videos, touch. Reinforce each action with appropriate verbs: see, hear, feel, etc.

Personal barrier

A personal barrier is placed between people if one of the interlocutors, for a certain reason, does not like the other. However, some people are more loyal to the shortcomings of others, so it is easier for them to overcome in themselves. Otherwise, communication between people becomes impossible. This comes from someone who cannot stop feeling discomfort or has shortcomings that irritate the interlocutor: slowness, bad manners, fussiness, etc. Do not hesitate to be considered an ignoramus; tell your interlocutor what irritates you so much in his behavior. However, do not forget that we are all not without shortcomings, therefore.

Motivational barrier

This barrier occurs in cases where people have different motives for entering into a conversation. For example, you want to talk to your husband about, and he wants to discuss the problem with you. In this case, people will not only not understand each other, it can lead to conflict in the family. In order to avoid troubles, before starting a conversation, voice the topic you want to talk about.

Barrier of incompetence

This barrier often occurs between employees. The interlocutor is annoyed by the incompetence of the other, due to this, feelings such as:

Anger;
Annoyance;
Feeling, etc.

There are two ways out of this situation:

Unobtrusively explain to a person that he is incompetent in this issue, and help achieve excellence;
End the conversation and do not bring it up again on this topic with this interlocutor.

The choice can be made based on your goals.

Ethical barrier

This option occurs where communication occurs between people different levels education. In this case, you should either accept the point of view of your interlocutor and not try to re-educate him, or leave communication. As a rule, people who have a common goal try to find mutual agreement and continue to do the common thing.

Communication style barrier

All people have their own communication style, which depends on the following factors:

Character;
Impulsivity;
Education;
Professional features, etc.

A person’s communication style is formed over the years, and changing it, if not impossible, is extremely difficult. The motivators of the communication style of people in society are:

Self-affirmation in society;
Support;
;
Attitude towards others;
Attitude towards oneself;
Manner of influence on others, etc.

As a rule, an interlocutor pursuing a certain goal has to accept the communication style of another person.

Aesthetic barrier

Do you enjoy communicating with an unkempt person who smells bad? There are not many people who turn a blind eye to this problem. Therefore, the hostility that arises at the sight of such an individual also extends to communication with him. Only in case of emergency, contact with such people occurs.

Social barrier

Here the social status of the interlocutor in society plays an important role. However, this is a person’s subconscious attitude, which disappears at the moment when a person does not know the status of the interlocutor in front of him.

Barrier of negative emotions

Have you ever had a casual conversation with someone who is extremely frustrated about some problem? This is impossible! Either you cannot lead his thoughts into the direction of the upcoming conversation, or you take everything (which has nothing to do with you) personally. In this case, serious and meaningful conversations are postponed until better times.

Installation barrier

This is one of the most unpleasant barriers that arise between people. Often, public opinion(gossip) runs ahead of the person about whom it originated. The interlocutor may not know you as a person, but may have “heard a lot” about you. Ask the person honestly what exactly their reason is. Understand the current situation and explain to him that he is mistaken.

Double barrier

Often we expect from the interlocutor the same thing that we would do ourselves. Illusions on this score are perceived by the other side as an imposition of their own opinion. Don't expect your partner to display his own character traits or to respond positively to your statements.

Barrier to Rudeness

This type of barrier refers to people's poor education. In response to our remarks, aggression and ignorance follow. There are two options:

Be patient and remain silent;
Avoid the conversation and do not communicate with this person.

The second scenario is the most acceptable in this situation.

Barrier of inability to hear and listen to the interlocutor

This barrier is caused by a person’s inattention to other people’s problems, bad manners or lack of interest in the topic of conversation. More often, people who are fixated on their own “I” and their problems suffer from the inability to listen to their interlocutor. If you need this communication, speak in such a way that the person becomes interested in listening to you. Change the topic of conversation, but as a result return to the idea that you are trying to convey to him. In this case, facial expressions and changes in intonation help.

The following categories of people are most likely to encounter communication barriers:

;
Ill-mannered;
Whose level of education is below average;
Distrustful and suspicious;
Self-centered;
Prone to manipulating other people;
Trying to benefit from everything that happens around them;
Dissatisfied with themselves, their life and position in society.

This list is endless. The main thing is that if you feel that in any development of events, a barrier in communication arises between you and your interlocutor, look for the true reasons for its appearance, work on yourself, but do not stop communicating.

1 March 2014, 14:24

STATE BUDGET

PROFESSIONAL EDUCATIONAL INSTITUTION

MOSCOW REGION

"SHATURSKY ENERGY TECHNIQUE"

(GBPOU MO "SHET")

Lecture hall for teachers

on the topic of:

How to understand that a barrier has appeared in communication?

Of course, being inside the situation, this is not difficult to do. In the process of difficult communication, we experience discomfort, distrust of our partner, we cannot open up, show emotions, we do not know what to say - in general, such communication cannot be called easy. However, if we need to assess the presence of psychological barriers, then knowledge of how people behave in situations of difficult communication will be very useful.

Our non-verbal language acts as such an external indicator. Hostility, craving for power and dominance, insincerity and the desire to stand out are especially clearly manifested in it. This manifests itself as follows:

First is eye contact. It is usually rare, non-intense, and sometimes completely absent.

Secondly, it's posture. Having felt difficulties in communication, people often take either unnatural, angular and tense postures, or, on the contrary, inadequately relaxed, sometimes even slack. Very often the body position is closed (crossed arms, legs, body turns away from the interlocutor) or “elevated” (the desire to sit higher, look down at the interlocutor).

Thirdly, gestures. As a rule, they are sharp and intense, which is also unnatural. There is a clearly expressed desire to hide your hands (for example, in your pockets or behind your back), clench your hands into fists, “grab” or take up more space for yourself through posture and gestures. This may be interspersed with private touching of oneself and another.

Fourthly, facial expressions. The face often expresses tension. The facial expressions are strange - for example, the mouth can smile, but the eyes remain motionless. In general, the face is characterized by expressions that demonstrate distrust and hostility towards the interlocutor, as well as contempt and anger.

Of course, a person experiencing communication difficulties does not always behave this way. These are only the most typical and striking markers, and from them one can conclude not only that there are barriers to interaction, but also about the interlocutors themselves - about their attitude towards each other and about their goals and guidelines in communication.

Ways to overcome communication barriers.

Having analyzed the literature studied on the identified problem, andknowingclassification of barriers to communication, their characteristics can determine ways to overcome them.

Thus, to overcome barriers in communication it is necessary:

Watch your appearance. This doesn't mean you always have to look like a movie star on the red carpet. On the contrary, in many situations it will be pretentious and unnatural. Appearance should evoke sympathy. This is facilitated by neatness, neatness and the ability to wear things that really suit.

Take into account the characteristics of the interlocutor: his age, gender, upbringing, character and views. Choose a communication style that suits the situation and people.

Try to put yourself in the shoes of your communication partner and try to understand his point of view. The most correct way to solve problems of communication barriers is to allow the other person to be different and different from you, and also try to understand his position, even if you do not agree with it.

Train empathy and sensitivity. This, accordingly, is the ability to empathize with other people and feel what is happening to them down to the smallest changes in their condition. These two traits are the key to success in communication.

Expect from your partners what they can give you, real things that correspond to their characteristics. Tell them about your expectations.

Don't try to fully meet your partner's expectations. It is better to be as natural as possible, but taking into account the interlocutor and social norms.

Watch your words. Messages should be logically connected, contain information that is interesting to the interlocutor, and be based on something common - for example, a general understanding of the meaning of words or some kind of minimal common memory. Speech must be understandable to the interlocutor both in the literal sense and in the sense of compliance with his horizons.

Be open and honest about your thoughts, feelings and expectations. If you are asked for something, and you are already sure of your refusal, it is better to voice it immediately. This way, neither you nor the interlocutor will waste time and resources.

Apply the “look from the outside” technique. Sometimes, in order to understand something (for example, to realize what exactly is interfering with your communication with your partner), you need to look at the situation from the outside, describe it in abstract words without introducing your emotions and personal characteristics.

Respect your communication partner. Even if he annoys you incredibly, you need to show your imagination and find something that will make you respect him. It could be some little thing, for example, his manner of emphasizing individual words with intonation. Or something more serious - for example, a very rude person who spends half of his income on charity. You can find something good and worthy of respect in any person, and if you can’t do this, then you should think about it – do you really need this communication?

Conclusion.

Unfortunately, there is no such thing in life that you can communicate without barriers only with pleasant people. As a rule, we all somehow find ourselves in situations where these difficulties arise. The task facing us at this moment is to feel the barrier, determine its type and apply the method that most effectively eliminates it. In fact, communication barriers are only an obstacle until we think about how to overcome them. More practice, attention to your interlocutor, sincere interest in what they tell you, and half the problem will be solved!

Bibliography

Antsupov A. Ya., Shipilov A. I. Conflictology.- M.: UNITY. 1999.

Bodalev, A.A. Formation of the concept of another person as a person / A.A. Bodalev. – L., 1970.

Vasilyuk, F.E. Psychology of experience. Analysis of overcoming critical situations / F.E. Vasilyuk. – M., 1984.

Fundamentals of conflictology. / Ed. Kudryavtseva V.N. - M.: Yurist, 1997.

Parygin, B.D. Anatomy of communication: Textbook. allowance / B.D. Parygin.
– St. Petersburg: Publishing house of Mikhailov V.A., 1999.

Workshop on socio-psychological training / Ed. B.D. Parygina. – Ed. 2nd, rev. and additional – St. Petersburg, 1997.

Tannen, D. You don't understand me! / D. Tannen. – M., 1996.

Whiteside, R. What people are talking about / R. Whiteside. – St. Petersburg, 1999

Reader on social psychology. / Ed. Kutasova T.V. - M.: Moscow State University. 1994.

Tsibulskaya M.V. et al. Conflictology. - M.: MGIESI, 1998.